A Bedtime Story, (well my 4 year old likes it!)

Once upon a time there was a Mummy who painted things, that's her there, see, in that picture, up a mountain with 2 items, (not for sale apparently), that she calls 'The Tweeps'.  

Now this Mummy liked to paint. She painted anything. She painted walls, she painted cupboards, she painted tiles, she painted chairs, she painted tables. She once even painted the Number 1 Tweep, (she claimed he was a smurf, but in the absence of any other smurf like activity it was deemed that he was merely asleep and she had painted him blue).  Like I said, she loved to paint.
One day the Mummy ran out of things to paint.  So determined was she that the dog took to hiding in the goat house and the goats disguised themselves as chickens.  The chickens took on a very duck-like attitude and the ducks...well lets just say they decided to chill out in the freezer for a while.   

So the Mummy took action.  The Mummy went to the auction.  All the sad looking, brown, not very shiny, a bit chewed and droopy looking lumps of wood looked at the Mummy when she walked round.
The Poor old sticks of furniture, were used to being prodded, poked and manhandled.  Men in pink corduroys wearing Panama Hats and Dickie Bows kept stroking their chipped veneers and opening their drawers.  Strange ladies with yellowing fingers and a penchant for glasses on string were nosing around their underbelly's and kicking their nether-regions.

They looked at the Mummy and wondered.  Why did this Mummy not gaze upon their scratched, scraped and bumped skin, utter a barely concealed 'Tut, Tut' and shake her head in disappointed disgust?  Why did this Mummy look upon their sad and neglected exteriors with glee and delight?  The furniture was very confused.  The furniture was of course thick as a plank.

The Mummy bought lots of tired old furniture that no one else wanted.

Despite her best efforts, all the furniture the Mummy bought was very sad. The furniture was sad because people though it was ugly. But the Mummy knew it wasn't ugly. The Mummy knew all the furniture needed was a new outfit.

So the Mummy called for her Fairy Godmother, whose name was Annie Sloan. The Fairy Godmother sent the Mummy lots of lovely Chalk Paint and the Mummy made new clothes for each sad old piece of furniture she found. 

The Tweeps

The Mummy painted, and painted, and painted, until the cold wind blew and the dark clouds gathered and winter forced the Mummy to retreat indoors.  

The Mummy looked upon her creations and she was pleased.

But the Mummy needed homes for her babies, (please note the image you see is not of items for sale but of the real, actually alive tweeps, absolutely NOT for sale).  So one day the Mummy decided to share her furniture and opened an Etsy Shop. 

From that day on all the furniture the Mummy dressed went to new homes all around the land. The Mummy was very pleased and the furniture was very beautiful.  

And they all lived happily ever after.

The End.